Fierce with Age Best of 2014

Welcome to our third annual round-up of the best of the best content about spirituality and aging that has appeared in Fierce with Age over the course of the year.
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As always, it was both challenging and rewarding to select from the abundance of wisdom that is speaking from and to a generation of seekers who are growing fierce with age together. You can access all of our back issues, overflowing with inspiration and spirituality, at the Fierce with Age archives. (Categories are searchable at the bottom of the Fierce with Age website home page.)Have a wonderful holiday season and I look forward to circling back to you at the dawn of the new year!
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–Carol Orsborn, Ph.D., Editor-in-Chief, Fierce with Age_
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A NEW KIND OF AGING
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“We now have this new kind of aging, but what is it for?  I believe something very different happens in the second half of life and especially in our maturity.At this time, the ego—the personal ‘I’—turns from issues of survival, competition, identity and achievement, to personal and spiritual growth, even transformation.  And this shift, I believe, is inborn.The psyche now releases a new kind of consciousness, re-introducing the mystical awareness that was prevalent in our early ancestors and temporarily known to us in childhood. But now the ego is more mature and can understand this consciousness in a new way.  This consciousness is the breakthrough of our time…”John Robinson from his pre-published novel work “Walden Three
The Mystical Transformation of Humanity
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DIGNIFY THE SHOCKIn his inspired book  Kaddish , author Leon Weiselter writes:  “There are circumstances that must shatter you; and if you are not shattered, then you have not understood your circumstances. In such circumstances, it is a failure for your heart not to break, and it is pointless to put up a fight, for a fight will blind you to the opportunity that has been presented by your misfortune.”At times like these, indeed all the time as we grow older, author and gerontologist Jane Marie Thieboult, who originally shared this quote with me, suggests that we think of our lives not as a journey, but as a pilgrimage.  Mature spirituality is not just about smelling the roses on an endless path.  The truth is that like it or not, we are all on our way to the same ultimate destination.  “Dignify the shock,” she writes.  “Sink, so as to rise.”I first heard the quote from Kaddish and Jane Marie Thieboult’s insights about life as pilgrimage not journey when we each presented at ASA 2014.  I first shared them as part of my presentation at the Sage-ing International Conference.

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JOY AND THE WINTER SAGE

“Becoming a sage is not taking on a new role, as if sagehood were all about me! Becoming a sage is more like letting God be God  through a disappearing ‘me.’ I become a mirror or, better, a window.

I become a place where my being and acting are more and more in union with the Great Mystery. More and more for the sake of all my kin. Empty of self, the dazzling suchness of life appears. What is present mirrors Source, Self, and Circle of All Life in non-possessive love and compassion, joy and peace.”

John G. Sullivan is Second Journey’s “philosopher in residence.  He is Distinguished University Professor of Philosophy (Emeritus) at Elon University. He lives with his wife, Gregg, in Burlington, North Carolina.

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THE FREEDOM TO DO IT WRONG

“There is no right or wrong way of growing old.  A great source of suffering in our culture, and one which hounds many people as they age, is that if they could just figure out how to do things right, there would be no suffering in age.  If they could just learn to succeed in aging correctly, as they struggled to succeed in marriage, parenthood, business, and other areas of their lives, age would cease to bring challenges they didn’t quite know how to face.

But when it comes to how we choose to live, creating our lives and the roles we play as we move along in years, the rigid notion of right and wrong, and of success in general, should be irrelevant to how we make our decisions.  We’re finally free to make ‘mistakes,’ follow our hunches, experiment boldly, or do nothing at all, as age liberates us from our old roles and offers us the chance to seize an authentic way of living.”

–Ram Dass, Still Here: Embracing Aging, Changing, and Dying   

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THE ONLY WAY TO SOLITUDE

“If a man’s vocation is to be really fruitful it must cost him something and must be a real sacrifice…

He can peacefully accept that when his false ideas of himself are gone he has practically nothing else left. But then he is ready for the encounters with reality: the Truth and the Holiness of God, which he must learn to confront in the depths of his own nothingness…This is the only liberation. The only way to true solitude.”

Thomas Merton, Seven Story Mountain:   as quoted in my River Diary Entry 24—Bottles and Twigs

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ON BECOMING SPIRITUALLY INVINCIBLE

“When we learn to love life more than we love loving our pain, we become spiritually invincible.  What part of life is there that can defeat us then?

There is nothing that can take everything from us when we are openhearted enough to love more than one thing.

We see signs of that truth everywhere in holy people:  a grief-stricken widow turns to painting and creates a whole new life for herself; the paraplegic learns the computer and develops a whole new world of friends online; the blind man who cannot see to do surgery becomes a chiropractor with healing hands.

Love of life and love of joy are opposite sides of the same coin.  When we give ourselves joy, we learn to love life.  To love life is to determine how to enjoy it, whatever its boundaries.”

Joan Chittister, OSB Called to Question”

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WOBBLING BEYOND MIDLIFE
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“This may be the hardest part of passing from older middle age into true old age:  the acceptance of limits, the paring down to essentials. I now think I know what the Talmud means when it says, ‘You are not obliged to finish the work, but neither are you permitted to desist from it.’ …
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My steps may have wobbled on the way to older age, but now that I have crossed the threshold my walk is growing stronger and my heart beats with something akin to a teenager’s anticipation of all that still lies ahead…Not for me will there be skydiving at age 75 or a half-marathon at 80.  I will be content with what Wallace Stevens called ‘the pleasures of merely circulating.’
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Such pleasures, in the movement of the spirit, will be enough.  They will be more than enough. I wish for myself and for all who are growing older release from fear and anxiety so that we can fully receive the valedictory gifts of vision and completion.”
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–Peter Laarman “Among School Children”, from Reflections: Yale Divinity School’s “Test of Time: The Art of Aging” 

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“I RESIGN”

Dear God,
This letter is to inform you that, effective immediately, I resign my position as Saint.

I find I am lacking the necessary qualities and skills for the job.  I had deep concerns about the ability to perform the required duties, but was afraid to say no to a glamorous, powerful position.  In addition, the long hours are getting to me.

I also withdraw my request to train for your role as General Manager of the Universe.  My skill set does not match the job duties…

At this time, I humbly apply for the position of Human…Should you need references, I can provide an extensive list of persons who can attest to my ability to be human…

Sincerely,

Aileen, Alaska (As reprinted from the January, 2011 issue of the Forum, magazine of Al-Anon, Alateen.
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About Carol Orsborn

Carol Orsborn, Ph.D. has written over 30 books including her critically-acclaimed Older, Wiser, Fiercer: The Wisdom Collection and The Spirituality of Age: A Seeker’s Guide to Growing Older with Dr. Robert L. Weber, which was awarded Gold in the Nautilus Book Awards in the category of Aging Consciously. She is founder and curator of Fierce with Age: The Archives of Boomer Wisdom, Inspiration and Spirituality housed at CarolOrsborn.com. She is host of the 2 leading book clubs in the field of conscious aging: Sage-ing International's live, virtual The Sage-ing Book Club and the in-person Conscious Aging Book Club, sponsored by Parnassus Books, Nashville. She received her doctorate in the History and Critical Theory of Religion from Vanderbilt University with specialization in the areas of adult spiritual development and ritual studies.